Funny & Real Parenting Advice Every Mom & Dad Will Appreciate – Notes #201-250

Real Parenting Advice

If you’re looking for real parenting advice on raising kids, well, you’ve possibly come to the right place.

While I’d never tell a person how to be a better parent — there’s books and videos that would do a much better job — I will share my own experiences in parenting.

If any of this funny parent advice makes parenting a little easier, I’ve done my job.

At the very least, it will make you laugh. Usually at me, and not with me.

Funny Parenting Tip #201

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #202

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #203

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #204

parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #205

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #206

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #207

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #208

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #209

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #210

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #211

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #212

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #213

funny parenting advice

RELATED: 

  • Honest & Funny Parenting Advice About Raising Young Kids
  • Funny Parenting Advice About Toddlers & Preschoolers
  • Funny Parenting Advice About Newborns

More Real Parenting Advice

Funny Parenting Tip #214

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #215

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #216

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #217

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #218

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #219

As a kid, every third commercial on during daytime TV peddled some exotic coffee. Coffee commercials filled the slots between ads for accident lawyers.

Coffee that’s so delicious it transports your entire mind, body, and soul to an exotic locale known for, I’d assume, fucking good coffee. Magical destinations like Paris, Belize, and Teaneck, NJ (which is magical if the wind blows in the right direction).

This was back in the 80’s when Starbucks didn’t line every avenue like street lamps and Dunkin Donuts propaganda centered around a sleep-deprived middle-aged schlub dreading a life filled with making greasy, sugar balls at the crack of dawn. “TIME TO MAKE THE DONUTS!” but said like it’s an outtake from The Shining.

Those commercials still exist, though updated to reflect the fact housewives don’t dream of Paris coffeehouses or attractive waiters named Jean Luc who might get to stick his French baguette in their oven before they fly home. New coffee commercials show women (and sometimes men) sipping coffee and luxuriating in a place they rarely get to relax — their own house.

The makers of these overpriced ground beans implore people to enjoy the “quiet” of their “finally empty house” with a beautiful, warm mug of (INSERT CRAPPY COFFEE BRAND HERE).

Screw that.

Sure, an empty house is a fantastic place — especially since I haven’t been alone in mine for over two years — but sipping a cup of coffee and staring out the window is the last item on my agenda of things to do in an empty house.

Also, every time I stare out my windows I notice a lawn that needs cutting, weeds that need pulling and my neighbor avoiding his now five-year plan to finish a roof. Not precisely the Eiffel Tower or a Thomas Kincade portrait on the other side of that glass.

What’s the first thing I’d do in an empty house? Probably sit down for a minute and think…

“Holy crap, I’m alone. What were all those things I’ve wanted to do when I finally had the house to myself? Oh, right, laundry, fix everything that’s broken, rearrange the bookshelves….that all sounds like work. Well screw that, I’m not doing work, and I’m not sipping coffee. I’ve got to find something relaxing to do.”

[Sits on the couch. Flips on TV. Watches nothing.]

“Shit, this is boring. I’m going to Starbucks. I need a coffee.”

Funny Parenting Tip #220

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #221

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #222

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #223

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #224

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #225

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #226

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #227

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #228

funny parenting advice

This “mistake in parenting lingo” moment actually happened and the woman kept saying “money shot” and “THE money shot” and “getting the money shot” and LADY COULD YOU SAY IT AGAIN BECAUSE I WANTED TO PISS MY PANTS LAUGHING TODAY.

Oh, and in case you’re clueless like this woman. Here you go.

Perhaps I should stop eavesdropping at the playground. But it’s so damn easy. And interesting.

Funny Parenting Tip #229

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #230

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #231

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #232

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #233

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #234

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #235

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #236

funny parenting advice

MORE FUNNY PARENTING ADVICE

Funny Parenting Tip #237

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #238

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #239

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #240

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #241

funny parenting advice 201

Funny Parenting Tip #242

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #243

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #244

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #245

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #246

funny parenting advice 201

Funny Parenting Tip #247

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #248

funny parenting advice

Funny Parenting Tip #249

funny parenting advice 201

Funny Parenting Tip #250

funny parenting advice

WHAT TO READ NEXT

Click for more funny parenting advice and follow me on FACEBOOK, TWITTER, INSTAGRAM or get occasional EMAILS about all my stuff.

JUST FOR PARENTS

New dad baby shower package 2

New Dad Baby Shower Gift Set

Need a baby shower gift for a new dad? Here’s the perfect package, personalized by me!
2019 Daily Parenting Calendar

Official 2019 Message With A Bottle Calendar

Death Before Decaf

Death Before Decaf

Don't ever let anyone tell you they drink coffee "for the taste."
New Dad Dictionary Book

The New Dad Dictionary

Everything dads need to know, from A to Z.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.